The main thing for an automobile journalist on the first of April is a leafing to the received press releases, remember what day is on the calendar. So this time, automakers pleased us with selected fables. There was everything: both cute fostering, in which everything is clear from the first line, and convincingly worked out stories with high -quality photographs, and even caustic satire. The employees of Motor carefully gathered all this noodles with their ears to prepare the following material from it.
BMW announced two new items at once. Firstly, the BMW M2 Dakar off-road compartment. About fifteen years ago, everyone would immediately call it a fable, but now that there is Porsche 911 Dakar … it looks more than convincing!
BMW M2 Dakar
BMW M GmbH
BMW M GmbH
BMW M GmbH
BMW M GmbH
In the photographs – or rather, computer renders – a two -door with a radical enlarged clearance, hefty off -road wheels in extended arches, powerful protection of the bottom, a “chandelier” of additional light and a trunk on the roof. Seeing the illustrations, we regretted that this is just a draw! ..
BMW M GmbH
BMW M GmbH
BMW M GmbH
The second premiere from the BMW on the day of the fool is a racing station wagon M3 Touring GT3 EVO. It turned out very believable. Judge for yourself: the serial BMW M3 received the Universal version back in 2022, and in competitions of the GT3 class since 2021, his close relative is performing-the M4 GT3 racing compartment. Well, the fact that the station wagons may not be strangers on racing tracks was proved back in 1994, the Volvo team with the 850 grade model Supertouring … It is a pity, but this will not come out even theoretically: according to the rules in the GT3 class, only two-door cars are allowed …
MAZ “Moskvich”
The Russian auto business also did not ignore the day of the fool. Moskvich’s capital car factory announced the creation of the Moskvich 3 crossover with an open body of the Cabriolet. Well, we saw this: without jokes, a convertible on the basis of the Nissan Murano crossover was produced in serial! True, the model turned out to be extremely unsuccessful and was quickly discontinued.
Suzuki Australia
The Australian unit of Suzuki showed the subscribers of its social networks the new Suzuki Slimny SUV – “The first two -wheel car 4 × 4”, the fruit of the Suzuki MotorcyCles and Suzuki Automobiles collaboration. Five points!
In Hyundai, the world’s first autopiloted toilet on wheels, working from hydrogen fuel cells, was proudly presented in the world. The joke is worked out to the smallest detail. Firstly, a thought out design-outwardly, Mobilet resembles a typical concept concept, which in recent years set up everyone who is not lazy: a square box with wheels in the corners of the body, an abundance of tinted glass. Secondly, advanced electronic assistants: the face recognition system is announced-for access inside (silent, hussars: only faces!). Thirdly, a high level of comfort is a relaxing ambient backlight with a choice of 64 color combinations and an artificial intellect-based noise reduction system.
Hyundai
Hyundai
Finally, a convenient application for calling a cabin with three levels of urgency is promised: Mobilet X (“If you still hold on”), Mobilet Comfort (“when you are already poking sweat”), Code-Red (“If you are already losing consciousness”). Dear readers, what do you think: what is the name of such a service? Piss-Shering? Shit-sharing?
The Indian division of the Chinese-English brand MG Motor promised to add a new function to the electronic assistant (ADAS)-in addition to auto-labor and retention in the strip, an assistant recognition as a pothole. Whether he will automatically evade the holes, or just warn about them – was not reported. Apparently, there is no lack of potholes on Indian roads …
The Canadian office of Subaru said that the next year, the SCubaru underwater car begins to sell (a game, scuba = scuba gear). True, the illustration without unnecessary delights was generated by a neural network.
ŠKODA promised that she would introduce Elroq and ENYAQ into electric crossovers between the headlights, on which an arbitrary text or pre -prepared messages can be displayed. For example, admitted love, ask for homework to take out the garbage … Well, or send a clumsy neighbor in the parking lot to hell – we suggested. But no! “The system based on artificial intelligence checks the text in 53 languages and replaces the foul language with the stars,” the press release said.
And Honda announced a new option for all models, from the city hatchback Jazz to the CR-V crossover: the seats with the smell of cat mint-which will allow to transport cats without the use of carrying, completely excluding the risk of scratching and hissing. And then they promise to add a transmission selector on which you can sharpen claws.
We did not fully understand this joke even after consulting Wikipedia: it indicates that the Kotovnik plant acts on the pets in the opposite way! Nepetalactone essential oil contained in its leaves causes narcotic excitement among pets. We quote literally: “The animal falls into a frenzy, licks and bites the plant, begins to wind head, breaks frantically with his body, purr loudly, rides on the ground.” In general, we are glad that this option will remain the Pervorelsky Roscience!
Stellantis
The Chinese manufacturer Leapmotor, partially owned by the Stellatis concern, presented a new option for its electric vehicles – a fitness mat that generates electricity for charging batteries. Almost along the Zhvanetsky: “Here is the ballerina – spins, already in the eyes of rush. It is necessary to attach it to Dynamo – let the current gives to underdeveloped areas. ”
The Chinese brands Jaeco and Omoda, which are part of the Chery Automobile Empire, announced dealer suboldary equipment – holder of food sticks. On the Jaecoo 7 crossover, he should be attached to the end of the multimedia screen, and on the models of Omoda 5 and E5 – in the niche on the central tunnel, next to the transmission selector. “Lapshi lovers will be able to enjoy the mouth-watering Chow Maine or a crispy duck, without looking up from the steering wheel,” the press release paints dignity.
And the Gunther Werks California Atelier, which produces Porsche 911 restaurants, unexpectedly reported that he would now begin to engage in electric cars – and the first offer would be Tesla Cybertruck pickups to replace stainless steel details. “Savings of 45% of weight, an increased stroke and increased corrosion resistance,” they promised on their page. And at the same time, they could not resist the joke on the current topic: “Tariffs do not apply to orders posted until 10 pm April 1!”
TickFord Racing
The Australian Racing Team TickFord Racing reported in their social networks that containers with cars and equipment fell into the sea on the way to the New Zealand stage of the REPCO Supercars series – but the team “evaluate the possibilities of how to catch the race.” From ourselves, we will explain that this championship was called the V8 Supercars, and is included in the top 3 most popular sporting events in Australia, and the next weekend should really take place on the TAUPō International Motorsport Park in New Zealand.
PS was also well pulled by journalists: for example, the publication of Hemmings Motor News reported that in 2026, under the Chevrolet Corvette brand, a small urban electric car with a capacity of 1063 horsepower on the basis of the baby Citroën Ami will release. The power was chosen specifically so as not to overshadow the indicators of the Corvette ZR1 supercar – after all, its V8 5.5 turbo engine gives out 1064 forces. The maximum speed is limited by a mark of 344 km/h, acceleration to 100 km/h – 2.35 seconds.
Hemmings Motor News
The German edition of the Motor1 portal “revealed sensational information” about the preparation for the production of the Great Universal Dacia Grand Combi, and then the same large sedan. The Volkswagen Passat car was allegedly developed on the Dacia Bigster crossover chassis. “The leadership of the Renault concern proposed to take the Renault Talisman model removed from the production, but we chose to use a modern chassis from Bigster,” the Germans quoted the fictitious chef Ion Gruma (Gluma in Romanian means “joke”).
[Motor1 Deutschland](https://de.motor1.com/news/755236/dacia-mittelklasse-kombi-vw-passat/)
Jaguar Land Rover
I must say that the most core duck launched a little-known Auto Drive website from the Republic of Bangladesh. The jokers from this tiny Asian state reported: the Indian concern Tata Motors, which owns Jaguar Land Rover, decided to get rid of Jaguar – dividing the assets, they sold the English brand of the Chinese corporation Geely Auto. The message caused a commotion on the network, many believed – although at the end of the text the authors mentioned the first of April. Well, we were wary, having just read the headline: after all, we know that in China Jaguar Land Rover has been cooperating with Chere since 2014.
And below you can look at the most successful draws of past years:
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